Friday, July 20, 2018

Bible Journal - 2 Timothy 1:7

"For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, 
but gives us power, love and self-discipline."
                                                             2 Timothy 1:7

I spent a couple of days pondering and studying today's class verse.  I really felt the Lord encouraging me to spend time with it.  It seems there is a lesson here that I need to reinforce in my life!

For years, I have been a 'closet' anxiety sufferer.  I think I just didn't realize what it was, or that 'it' had a name.  I deal with frequent adrenaline rushes, stress, and sometimes crippling fear.  Social events and even things that I enjoy lately bring on anxiety issues.  When I teach an art or Zentangle class at the local town hall, a church or library, I stress about it for weeks before.  I love to lector at our church, but I start tensing up days before I am to read.

I feel embarrassed talking about my 'condition.'  But I have discussed it with a couple of close friends.  I'm not sure they really understand, however.  I feel that people think it's something I can control, or that I allow.  It's neither.  I certainly don't want to feel this unmitigated fear and stress daily.  If I could control it, I would.  I have tried medication, however, that brought it's own little series of issues (even worse than the anxiety).  I am trying some relaxation techniques.  With the help of my doctor, diet and exercise, and lots and lots and LOTS of prayer, I am working through my anxiety issues.  It's a daily struggle, and an uphill battle.  But, through God's love, and the Holy Spirit, I have hope.  

Which brings me back to today's verse.  God wants me to be courageous and brave.  He gives me power daily, through His gift of the Holy Spirit, to overcome my fears and anxiety.  I do a better job some days than others calling on His power.  He wants me to serve Him, and has gifted me with time and talent to do so.  I want to serve Him with power, love, and self-control.  I can do this by staying close to Him, reading and studying His Word, and calling on the Holy Spirit.  

I am sharing my story here, as I know that others suffer from this condition, as well.  I pray my story will help others find the hope that I have found.  If you are a fellow-anxiety sufferer, know that there IS hope.  And you don't have to do it alone!  I would love to hear from you.  Please comment below and I will get back to you. 

"The Spirit of God does NOT make us timid (fearful), but gives us POWER, LOVE, and SELF-CONTROL."

I believe this with all my heart.  

Blessings,
 
JOURNALING NOTES:  For my page, I used Gansai Tambi watercolors, painting them on randomly around a hand-drawn dove that I penciled in.  Then I added my notes and the verse with a micron pen.  I dried the page with a heat tool, then pressed it with an iron to flatten the page and remove some of the wrinkles.

No comments:

Post a Comment